Sexual Misconduct Prevention

Sexual misconduct prevention and child, youth and adult protection are both the work of communities. Each individual must learn and grow in the ways of safety and prevention, but the entire community is also responsible to ensure that its ethos is directed toward protecting our most vulnerable. Therefore, I am pleased to announce that both Grand Canyon and de Cristo presbyteries have available to them online training courses.

            These courses are offered through the two presbyteries' primary insurance carrier but are offered to ALL members. To clarify things from last week: all candidates, all active teaching elders (whether honorably retired or, more likely, still working stiffs, the key word is “active”), and all active CREs will be required to take one training course on an annual basis, pending approval of said policy from the respective presbyteries. However, any member can ask to take the online training courses by emailing Carolyn McBurney in the presbytery office. Your particular church is covered for training through the presbyteries regardless of its insurance carrier.

            The first course, “Meet Sam,” took me 20 minutes to complete. I was dismayed to discover that I did not know all the material already! My wife is a therapist who has worked in programs treating both victims and perpetrators of sexual abuse, and in my hubris I thought I knew all the course would cover. So imagine my shock when in a pre-test early in the training I got only six of seven questions correct.

            In Meet Sam I learned the difference between preferential, situational and indiscriminate molesters and how they relate to children, youth and the social environments constructed by the adults trying to create safe space. Can you describe these differences to another person? If not, it is a helpful distinction to learn. I learned also about the three keys a perpetrator needs in order to abuse. Can you say what those three things are? If you cannot, this course would be a great place for you to start deepening your awareness of the issues. (Hint: the three things needed are access, privacy and control, and the course explains them in detail.) I learned about the importance of physcial, emotional, behavioral, and community boundaries: to set clear limits for each and to be aware of anyone who violates them either intentionally or unintentionally. Finally, I learned the percentages of abuse perpetrated by family, friends and strangers. Can you name which category of relationships perpetrate the most abuse? This is the question I got wrong in the pre-test. I answered “friends” but the correct answer is family (60%), then friends (30%), and then strangers (10%).

            As a final observation, let me share a personal note: I felt sick throughout these 20 minutes. I resisted going in-depth into the material. I realized I prefer to remain ignorant. The thought of sexual abuse is repulsive to virtually all of us, which is why denial is so easy. And this is why these online training courses are so important: denial is not an option.

Grace and peace,

Brad Munroe